Tundra Telegram: Books That May Be Bad, But Are Perfectly Good At It

Hello, and thanks for joining us at Tundra Telegram, the column where we’re unapologetic about recommending books for topics that readers have on the brain.

This weekend, one of the world’s largest sporting events will be held. And every year, that sporting event features an intermission that boasts some of the biggest, most elaborate musical performances of the year (sometimes even overshadowing the game). This tradition goes back to the 1990s, when record-breaking musicians took over the intermission from marching bands.

This Sunday, February 12, Barbadian singer, actress, and businesswoman Rihanna will perform this show, so we’ve gone through our library of children’s and YA titles to suggest some perfect book pairings to match your favorite Rihanna single. Sit back and relax; we’re about to talk that talk.

PICTURE BOOKS

Umbrella”: The color of the brolly in Rihanna’s hit single isn’t described (because it’s largely metaphorical), but The Pink Umbrella by Amelie Callot and Geneviève Godbout matches the song perfectly. For it is raining more than ever in café owner Adele’s life, but her friends and customers let her know – in one way or another – they’ll always be her friend.

What’s My Name?”: Anoosha Syed’s picture book That’s Not My Name! shares the song’s interest in knowing names and loving your own. And when Mirha’s classmates begin – after a little coaching – to pronounce her name correctly, she thinks to herself, They’re so amazing, they took the time to figure me out. (And, like featured artist Drake, Syed also hails from Toronto.)

Work”: Nobody tells Duck he has to work, but in Sonny Ross’s Duck Gets a Job, career-focused Duck decides he needs a job in the city. Duck gets that job to make that bread (presumably to eat), but finds himself bored with the drudgery of spreadsheets, sitting in a cubicle, and filing reports. (Join the club, Duck!) Our feathered friend quits to find new work in another field and finds not all work makes him feel like dirt.

Shut Up and Drive”: Few picture books can match the feeling of bombing around in a hot rod like Rihanna’s ode to car culture more than Wheels, No Wheels by Shannon McNeill. Sure, the tractor, bicycle, and skateboard that a llama, cat, and turtle thieve from their farm may not be rides smoother than a limousine, but the farm animals and the book’s humor have momentum to spare.

Rude Boy”: There’s nothing ruder than selfishly claiming a row of bushes for your own and not letting any other animals live there. Especially when it’s winter! That’s why Hedgehog by Ashlyn Anstee is our choice for “rude boy.” He kicks out birds, squirrels, groundhogs (last week throwback) out of his hedge before things go a little “boom boom boom,” and he learns a few important lessons.

CHAPTER BOOKS & MIDDLE GRADE

B*tch Better Have My Money”: Gabby, Priya, and Mindy learn about both accounts payable and dogs in the graphic novel PAWS: Gabby Gets It Together by Nathan Fairbairn and Michele Assarasakorn. The trio combine their shared love of animals and shared inability to have pets of their own and turn it into a lucrative dogwalking business. Things are fun for a while, but like RiRi, they soon learn the dangers of combining friendship and money.

Diamonds”: Twelve-year-old Piper’s astronaut-slash-television-host hero frequently shouts the catchphrase “shine on” in the novel Shine! by J.J. and Chris Grabenstein. It’s a phrase which would not be out of place in this hit single. But Piper, newly arrived at Chumley Prep where every kid seems to be the best at something, does not feel bright like a diamond. In time, she discovers the brightest diamonds don’t shine just for themselves.

Stay”: I want you to stay, is what young Bea says when her parents divorce in The List of Things That Will Not Change by Rebecca Stead. But the sentiment is not directed to one parent or another, but rather her life, which is rapidly going through changes. That’s why she keeps a green notebook with the titular list – so she knows that when her dad remarries, when she gains a new stepsister, there are certain things that will always stay true.

Only Girl (in the World)”:  In Red Fox Road by Frances Greenslade, thirteen-year-old Francie feels like she’s the only girl in the world. Mainly because she finds herself stranded in the wilderness after a number of mishaps during a family vacation. Only her survival skills – not love – will keep her alive.

YOUNG ADULT

Disturbia”: For one of Rihanna’s spookiest songs, we recommend one of the scariest YA novels in recent years: There’s Someone Inside Your House by Stephanie Perkins. Combining steamy romance and blood-soaked horror with equal aplomb (just like the song), the book follows Makani Young, new to her Nebraska town, as she tries to find a little romance while students at her high school die in increasingly gruesome ways.

Don’t Stop the Music”:  It may be hard to imagine a single Rihanna song making it onto the subject of Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan. But the playlist is infinite in this late-night love story in which two music fans trawl NYC’s bars and clubs to find a legendary band’s secret performance, so by definition, it will not stop.

Love the Way You Lie”: Okay, technically this is an Eminem song, but nevertheless it showcases Rihanna and is a great companion to YA novel No Filter and Other Lies by Crystal Maldonado. Fat, brown, bisexual Kat creates a fake Instagram account for “Max” in a moment of weakness, populating it with photos of her thin, white friend Becca. Kat begins to thrive in her fake online persona. But when the truth is revealed, will Kat’s life be ruined? No matter what, readers will very much love the way the messy and very human Kat lies.

We Found Love”: What more hopeless place is there than 1950s Red Scare America for two lesbians to find love? That’s the setting of Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo, in which Chinese American Lily Hu falls for white American Kathleen Miller in a Chinatown lesbian bar. While their romance blossoms, anti-Chinese and homophobic sentiment threatens to end their connection at every turn.

Love on the Brain”: If romance and grey matter are what you’re looking for, you need Alexene Farol Follmuth’s My Mechanical Romance, in which two robotics team members fall for each other and find they soon have more than transistors and college applications on their minds.

We’d love to hear more Rihanna book recommendations from you, so suggest your picks in the comments!

Tundra Telegram: Books That Killed the Radio Star

Hello, and thanks for joining us at Tundra Telegram, the column where we plug into the subjects we like all too well, and recommend some truly g-l-a-m-o-r-o-u-s books.

This past Sunday, social media platforms lit up like starships in reaction to the highs and lows of the 2022 edition of a video music award ceremony. Though the namesake of the awards no longer plays music videos – we note, curmudgeonly – all that Sunday night and the following Monday morning, everyone online was talking about new music, be it BLACKPINK, Lizzo, or the surprise Taylor Swift album announcement.

In honour of this celebration of music, we’re doing something a little different this week: we’ve recommended books – three in each of our usual categories – connected to the winners, performers, and moments from this past Weeknd’s music video awards. So read on, because the music revolution will be televised!  

PICTURE BOOKS

Taylor Swift broke a record for most video of the year wins with her 2022 win for her epic “All Too Well: The Short Film.” And as we all remember, the song chronicles the rise and breakup of a romance, in which the imagery of a scarf (which may or may not be in the possession of Jake Gyllenhaal, and which The Verge has described as “the green dock light of our time”) takes centre stage. We can’t help but be reminded of the new seasonal classic Mistletoe by Tad Hills, in which winter-weather-loving mouse tries in vain to connect to her elephant friend who only wants to stay inside where it’s warm and cozy. Of course, the titular mouse knits a perfect holiday gift for her elephant friend. And you know that elephant would never forget it at his sister’s house.

Bad Bunny, the Puerto Rican trap and reggaeton artist and sometime wrestler (!), also made history becoming the first non-English-language act to win artist of the year. Whether it’s his international smash hits or unwavering support for the Latin LGBTQ community, there’s not much bad about Bad Bunny. But the same cannot be said for Richard Scarry’s Naughty Bunny, who scares his mother by blaring the TV too loudly, scribbles all over the walls, and kicks up a fuss when he should be napping. (Actually, he doesn’t sound that bad either.) But though he’s a naughty rabbit, he still manages to be loveable, like Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio – as both male and female backup dancers can attest!

Lil Nas X and Jack Harlow took home a few awards for their blockbuster video of “Industry Baby,” which sees the two rappers breaking out of a very special prison. The perfect picture book pairing would be Milo Imagines the World by Matt De La Peña and Christian Robinson, which follows Milo and his older sister on a long subway ride, during which Milo imagines and draws pictures of the lives of the other riders. Not only does it match the video’s creativity, but the subway ride Milo and his sister make is a weekend journey to visit their incarcerated mother.

CHAPTER BOOKS & MIDDLE GRADE

Jack Harlow also took home the trophy for “song of the summer,” and had one of the biggest performances of the night with his song “First Class.” And while the video may more be about a moneyed lifestyle than anything academic, there’s no first class more appealing than that in Narwhal’s School of Awesomeness by Ben Clanton. The graphic novel sees beloved sea buds Narwhal and Jelly becoming substitute teachers for the first time for a school of fish. Their education methods are unconventional, but full of fun and positivity. Jack Harlow may have his first class up in the sky, but does he have wafflematics class under the sea?

One of the most notable couples on the red carpet this past weekend was goofy rapper Yung Gravy and TikTok star Addison Raes mother (Sheri Nicole Easterling). We know one person who likes Gravy more than any Tiktokkers’ mothers, and that’s food-obsessed dachshund Weenie in Mad About Meatloaf, the first book in the Weenie featuring Frank and Beans graphic novels by Maureen Fergus and Alexandra Bye. After all, what is a gravy, but meatloaf sauce? And no one loves meatloaf more than Weenie, who hilariously conscripts his fellow pets Frank (a cat) and Beans (a hamster) on a convoluted quest to get some.

Singer and flautist Lizzo gave one of the night’s standout performances and won the award for “video for good” for her new hit “About Damn Time,” an uplifting jam that celebrates survival through hardships. A book that is also about time is Jen Calonita’s The Retake, a time-travelling middle-grade novel about a girl, Zoe, who downloads a magical app on her phone that allows her to travel back in time to moments where she and her best friend Laura started to drift apart. Not only that, it looks at themes of social media pressures and bullying, something Lizzo knows a thing or two about, as well.

YOUNG ADULT

Few musical moments have made this writer feel older than the performance of Eminem and Snoop Dogg of their “From the D 2 to the LBC.” The two hip-hop artists performed as their Bored Ape avatars in the metaverse in a dystopian confluence of advertising for NFTs and Facebook products before they took the stage for real. If you like virtual worlds and avatars but are looking for a little more adventure and social commentary, you should check out Wab Kinew’s Walking in Two Worlds. In it, a shy Indigenous teen on the Rez, Bugz, dominates in a multiplayer video game world called the Floraverse, but finds herself caught between her two realities.

A less bizarre but no less memorable stage performance came from K-Pop group BLACKPINK of their song, “Pink Venom.” And to match the sweet-but-deadly vibe of the song (and the group), we’re going with Danielle Vega’s The Merciless. A group of popular girls with perfect hair perform brutal exorcisms on their classmates. Queen bees meet torture scenes – and with a pink cover, to boot! “Straight to ya’ dome” will have a completely different (and gruesome) meaning after reading.

Finally, Thai K-Pop rapper Lisa (one-fourth of BLACKPINK) won in the “Best K-Pop” category for “Lalisa.” Lisa’s youth, training with YG Entertainment, is not unlike that depicted in the YA novel Idol Gossip by Alexandra Leigh Young. In the book, Alice Choy is discovered by the fictional Top10 Entertainment and struggles to stay true to herself and overcome the haters in this insiders’ look at a K-Pop Academy, the kind at which Lisa herself became the first non-ethnically Korean trainee.

Happy reading, friends!